Date: 5/29/2006
From: Lynda
Message: So hard to believe it's been a year, yesterday, since you left us. I spent some time yesterday remembering you, thinking about all the funny stuff you did and how much I missed having you around. I remembered coming back to your apt to p/u my dog after work, that was around 11 pm. You were in bed reading, moving your lips as you always did when you read. I unlocked the door, and came in. I didn't have to be to quiet as that oxygen machine was loud. I stood in the living room giggling because I knew what I was going to do. As soon as I got my giggling under control I ran full tilt boogie into your bedroom without saying a word. You flung your arms about up on the air and almost came off your bed, then called me some dirty names and we laughed. You were so much fun. I miss those times, and I miss you more then words can describe. <sp> I feel lost without you here... I do most of my thinking as I'm driving (which is a lot you know me, maw, that hasn't changed)... and it seems that is when I miss you most. I am so thankful for the time we shared together, and how much more enriched my life is because you were my mother, my confidant, my best friend. <sp> The other day I was at Jeannie's. She had a friend over from Sweden and I took along great grandma's book. I remember how much we both wanted that translated. Well guess what? I finally got it done. All I could think of was how excited I would be to bring it to you and tell you what it says finally. Then it hits all that much more hard to know your not right here to talk to anymore. I remind myself of where you are, dancing in that sky and living it up, visiting with your grandma and all the things you wanted to do. That helps. <sp> You know, a few days after you boarded that heaven bound plane, my mind was filled with memories from long ago before you were ill. It then hit me that I lost you not once, but twice. Sounds silly I know but then I missed you even more. Hard. <sp> Well, I just wanted the opportunity to say I love you maw, and I miss you. XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Date: 3/27/2006
From: Lynda
Message: I feel compelled to respond to Debi's 3/7/06 post. I don't believe it is respectful to the dearly departed to post such falsehoods as she speaks about here. If something needs to be said to me directly, I can be reached via email = lallenwa@hotmail.com

Date: 3/26/2006
From: Lynda
Message: Happy 65th Birthday Maw! I Love and Miss you.

Date: 3/7/2006
From: Debi
Message: Hi Mom, Would be really nice to have you around right now, Lynda is really going through a hard time with different things in her life and could really use your advice about stuff again. As always she does not want to trust anyone or allow anyone to get close to her. She thinks everyones out to get her even her family .. whats up with that .. ? Hey Mom do you think you could maybe come and visit her and talk to her to help her in this time of need, as she has turned her heart away from God. I sure do miss you Mom, and thank you for visiting me a few weeks ago that was very comforting to me. See you soon Mom

Date: 12/24/2005
From: Lynda
Message: Hey Maw - first christmas without you here. Really missing you right now. Really missing Dad too. Love you xoxo

Date: 9/27/2005
From: Lynda
Message: Hey maw - just thinking about you today. Missing you.

Date: 6/20/2005
From: Written by Lynda
Message: As I sit here and think of what to say, many things come to mind. I think about mom, and what she would have me say. As everyone knows, I had the privilege of caring for mom in these past 6+ years. In that time, we had many conversations about her life, and her death, her regrets, and her hopes. I think of the many conversations through these past years, and based on those chats, this is what I will share. I think about how privileged we all are. We are privileged because we are allowed to make our own choices. Some of the most important choices include who we share our life with, and to what extent we allow others into our network of loved and cherished ones. I have always been very close to mom. It was my choice to be, and her choice to let me in. It was not because I am any better, nor worse then any of her 7-children. She loved all of her children equally, and this was a statement she reiterated many times. When I think of mom, I see and remember the sweet, thoughtful, and considerate person she was. All she ever wanted to do was love each and every one of us, and to bless us with what little she could. She was deeply wounded by those who chose to shut the door on her love. Many times she was perplexed at why it had to be this way, and many tears she shed for it. It never stopped her from trying though, one more chance to say she loved us, through her thoughtfulness and her small gifts. Words are simply words, sometimes meaningful, sometimes not. What speaks the loudest and what people remember the most is what we do, and how it made them feel. Mom was not without flaws. None of us are. She made mistakes. All of us do. However, she learned how to forgive those who trespassed against her, and wanted the same forgiveness for her own trespasses. She did not hold grudges, nor did she hold our mistakes over our heads. Our whole life is about freedom of choice. It’s our choice. Mom made mistakes with me too. But I learned years ago, through this very church that we are gathered at today, the importance of forgiveness. When we are unable to forgive, it causes our heart to grow hard, and we become bitter, and angry. When our heart is hard and bitter, we cannot grow and move forward. We are held back, and our growth becomes stunted. This causes us to forget to smell the flowers, and listen to the birds sing, and feel the sun shinning upon us. We no longer are able to have joy in the little miracles that are here, all around us. The simple, little things that bring about so much joy when there is no cloud in our sky. If mom were standing here today, talking to us before she boards her plane to her Mansion in the Sky, she would say to each of us that she is sorry for her mistakes. She does not want her mistakes to keep us from moving forward anymore. Please forgive her for her mistakes, and let today be the birth of your healing process to wholeness. Let that be her last gift to us all. **************** With that said, I have just a couple of last thoughts; Mom could be a real stinker sometimes. There are to many stories on this subject, and so I’ll share this one. During the time she lived with Patrick and I in our Spanaway house, she became ill and spent a lot of time in bed. I was sitting with her for a while, and I told her that I believe that people know when their time is close. I asked her to share with me when she felt her time was getting close because I didn’t want to walk into her room and find a dead person lying there. She thought this was real funny. Well a few months passed by and I had brought her a cup of coffee one fine morning like I always did. I set it on her nightstand, and said “Good morning sunshine”. She didn’t respond. I got a little freaked out, and got closer and shook her and said “hey mom”. Again nothing. I bent down, and put my ear by her nose to see if I could hear her breathing, and heard nothing. I backed away as I turned to look at her and her eyes were open, she jumped at me and said “BOO”!! I jumped and she couldn’t stop laughing. ************** I asked Mom what she most looked forward to about “going home” - She gave it some thought, and said, “I am looking forward to seeing my Grandma. Her name is Sigrid Nordena Carlson. She is the one that named me you know.” I asked her what was special about her. She said “she was a really neat Grandma, I used to get to go spend weekends with her when I was in foster care. She read to me, and played with me. I can hardly wait to see her, and I can hardly wait for you kids to meet her.”

Date: 6/20/2005
From: Written by Terry Dorris
Message: I remember one time when grandma and me where making Ginger bread houses for fun. It was in December of 2003. We picked grandma up and brought her to our house. I made the dough by scratch and we each took a peace of dough out and rolled it. I cut the dough into a house, and Grandma made the store. We also made some trees. When it was done baking we got to decorate them. We had to use hot glue to keep the peaces together and we used frosting to cover it up and decorate it. We put some candy decorations on the house and made a wall from sugar cubes and frosting. Lynda was video taping every so often. Grandma kept eating the frosting, and then Lynda came around the corner from the kitchen and caught grandma on the tape recorder. She was holding the can of frosting upside down and pouring it into her mouth. Grandma jumped when she saw Lynda and I was laughing really hard because grandma was goofing off so much she was really funny. She taught me a lot of card games, and we liked to do arts and crafts together. ............ I really miss you grandma, Love, Terry

Date: 6/6/2005
From: Someone who cares
Message: My thoughts and prayers are with ALL of you today and always. God Bless.

Date: 6/6/2005
From: Bettye Shelton
Message: Hello Lynda, thank you for writing to Ricky Van. We are very sorry to hear about your Mother's passing away. I apologize sincerely for not reading your email before this morning. I am so sorry if I am sending these lyrics to you too late. Perhaps, the words will still bring comfort to you and your family. ____________________________ TO MY MANSION UP IN THE SKY This plane I’m riding they say it’s leaving for a place where you’ll never die and the pilot will be my Jesus to my mansion up in the sky Now don’t be grieving because I’m leaving and don’t cry when I say goodbye there’ll be no weeping to where I’m going to my mansion up in the sky This plane I’m riding will be returning some sweet day Lord by and by so get ready to go with Jesus to my mansion up in the sky Now don’t be grieving because I’m leaving and don’t cry when I say goodbye there’ll be no weeping to where I’m going to my mansion up in the sky My journey with Jesus will end my sorrow heal my afflictions and no more I’ll cry I’ll be rejoicing while I’m going to my mansion up in the sky Now don’t be grieving because I’m leaving and don’t cry when I say goodbye there’ll be no weeping to where I’m going to my mansion up in the sky Repeat Chorus

Date: 6/5/2005
From: sean allen
Message: It's sad to know your gone. I miss you so much. I love you mom

Date: 6/4/2005
From: LeeAnne Ray
Message: Lynda & Family: I am feeling many things right now, and you are at the top of my list of prayers, for courage, strength, and hope. I am soooo sorry for your loss. I loved Rose so much, and I believe she is the lucky one right now, because she is with everyone she has ever lived with and loved. Right now she is being cherished and loved, like no being on earth could do. I envy her!! Love, hugs, kisses, ALWAYS AND FOREVER! LeeAnne Dearest Rose: I miss you. I trust you are in the best of company, and hope that you can help and protect your loved ones here on earth from sadness and any harm that may come their way. Please say I love you to my dad! Love you forever! LeeAnne

Date: 6/3/2005
From: Clarence Lannon
Message: Our condolences go out to you and your family. We wish to share your grief, and offer prayers to help in any way possible. You will be in our thoughts and prayers.

Date: 6/3/2005
From: Bryan Alexander
Message: thoughts and prayers to you and your family lynda.....nobody likes to loose mom. plant a tree to represent your mom and each time you go to that tree, you can talk to your mom.

Date: 6/2/2005
From: Pastor Jann Butler & By His Word Christian Center
Message: Lynda and family, Sorry about the loss of your precious mother but we know where she is,and that is the most important thing. It will be an honor to officiate for her service and to help in any way that we can. You and yours are in our thoughts and prayers.

Date: 6/2/2005
From: Audrey Reese
Message: I will always love and cherish the friendship, laughter, and fun that I shared with Rose and her daughter, Lynda! She will be greatly missed - I can't wait to see her in Heaven! Love, Audrey.

Date: 6/1/2005
From: Coral Anika Theill
Message: Dear Rose, I will miss you, Rose. I was never blessed to meet you, but was thankful our paths crossed through your daughter, Lynda, these past few months. You were gracious to read my book and true life story. I was profoundly moved by your letters of encouragement and the love you shared with me. I immediately sensed you were a "light worker." You wrote me a few weeks ago that you felt spiritually bonded with me in a very special way, even though we had never met. I count it as one of my most special blessings to have known you even for short time. You have nutured your spirit to such great beauty, that even though you have passed to the other side, your presence will always be with us. I am thankful to know your daughter, Lynda. You have both made such a huge difference in my life and I am grateful for both of you. My prayers surround your family at this difficult time of loss. Love, Coral Anika Theill

Date: 6/1/2005
From: Shelly Bennett
Message: Please accept my deepest sympathies and warmest prayers for you and your family.

Date: 6/1/2005
From: Mickey Lashlee
Message: Lynda, I sorry to hear of your loss, I'll pray that you are comforted. Your Mom was always kind and warm to me, and I know she meant a lot to you. I'm sure she will be missed. It's too bad that smoking is not seen for the killer it really is, however, freedom gives us the opportunity to make choices that are "unhealthy", we all do it, one way or another. Perhaps now would be a good time for us all to reflect on our choices, and the long term effects on ourselves and others.

Date: 6/1/2005
From: Edward DeVito
Message: Lynda and family: I am sorry to hear of your loss, may you find comfort in the memories Rose left behind for each of you - now and into the future. God bless

Date: 5/31/2005
From: Cindy Crawford
Message: I'm so sorry to hear the news about Aunt Rose. As a young girl I have many wonderful memories of Aunt Rose and Uncle Bob. Know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers. Wish you weren't so far away and that I could be there with you! Love - Cindy (Fairchild) Crawford

Date: 5/31/2005
From: Dick and Joanne
Message: You were always our dear sister, forget the "in-law". May you rest in peace, away from the pain and earthly tribulations. We are so glad you will join Bobby and Dad Allen. You will each take care of the other. We love you.

Date: 5/31/2005
From: Jeff and Kris DeVito, Chris Cranford
Message: Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time ~ May you find comfort in your memories and the freinds and family that surround you. Please accept our deepest sympathies for you and your family.

Date: 5/31/2005
From: Karen Cutsforth
Message: Lydna, So sorry for your lost. May god bless you and the family.

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Lynda
Message: I miss you mom

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Maggie Quaderer
Message: Lynda my heartfelt sorrows are with and your family in this time of sorrow. May you find strenght in knowing that others deeply care for you in this time of sorrow. Loving mememories will see you through tomorrow. Sincere Condolences Maggie

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Doreen & Michael
Message: Lynda, your mom was loved by so many of us and she is going to be greatly missed. Rose always knew how to put a smile on peoples faces and make them feel welcome. Memories of all the good times you shared with your mom is something you can keep locked in your heart forever. Our deepest symphathys' go out to you and your family, Michael & Doreen

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Mark Bennett
Message: My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Sharon Carter
Message: I will always remember Rose as a great inspiration. She e-mailed me the most encouraging scriptures at a time when I most needed them. I recall when we went out to lunch at Bimbo's Italian Restaurant when it was still downtown. She said Lynda would have liked to have gone with us. Rose will be greatly missed, but she is in the arms of her Lord and we will see her again.

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Debi
Message: I know it was not your time to go just yet ! Justice will prevail for the wrongfull way you were treated and the ones responsible for cutting your time short. I will Love Always Mom

Date: 5/30/2005
From: Jan Cormier
Message: Lynda: I appreciate you letting me know about your mom. It was interesting how she and I reconnected via e-mail. She was hoping to get together early in 2005 to see each other in person. I'm sorry that meeting never took place. May the Lord be with you and your family and comfort you in this time of sorrow. Sincerely, Jan Cormier.